She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
