he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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