i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
