we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
