:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
