the condom got lost in my hair
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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