i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
