I have demons in me.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
accomplished twins. life is a go
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
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