OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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