Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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