I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
