I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize