how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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