I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Randomize
