so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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