Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize