Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
