i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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