My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Randomize