Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
