I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I forget how to act sober
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
