is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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