ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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