So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
