Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
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