You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
