don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Randomize
