if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
