i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
We are two peas in an std pod
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
