You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
