It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
