Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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