It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
