She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
