Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
that is very illegal...i love you.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
