i wish my penis had a tongue
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
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