when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
