4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize