its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
