You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
