We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
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