oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize