People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
