From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize