Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
