Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
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