Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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