I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
