Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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