i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
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